I grew up in Bakersfield CA. I lived there for 18 years. I left to go to college and never looked back. I never kept in touch with any of my friends back at “home.” When I would go home for vacation, I knew people were in town and wanted to hang out, but I never felt like I needed to do that. Everyone had changed. I had changed. Going to college changed my life and God brought amazing people into my life. Living out my faith became real. Living for God was a struggle. I struggled between living my life and living for God. It became clear to me around junior year that God was calling me to do missions. When I was attending guy’s group one night, Elliot Chung said something that I’ll never forget. “The least God expects you to do is change the world.” How was I going to change the world? God showed me how I would change the world. I went on a mission trip in 2008 to Taiwan. I saw a different side of Taiwan. It was then that I realized that I would be going back. Shortly after, God called me to Portland to attend Multnomah Seminary. Seminary has changed my life and Portland has changed my life. I left all my friends and didn’t look back. I haven’t been back to CA in a year and though I talk to some of my friends back in Long Beach it isn’t often. I came to Portland knowing that in 2 years time I would be leaving again. There is a small chance that I will stay in Portland but the likelihood is small. Before I left Long Beach, I took myself out of the fellowship and started to create stronger ties with people. There are 4 people I can name that I know will always be friends to me. Jodi Poon, Krystie Chin, Ginger Ying, and Rayanne Chung. I know that I can call on these girls for anything and everything. We are able to stay friends no matter what. It seems to me that God has given me the gift to pick up and leave. No questions asked, no tears shed, no regrets. I remember when I was in 6th grade and the year was over. All my friends were crying because they all knew that this was the last time they would be at this school. I just sat there. I sat on the bus and watched as everyone cried. I don’t think its because I have a heart of stone, but I just knew it was coming. I’ve been preparing myself to do mission work and change the world since I’ve arrived in Portland. It wasn’t until recently that I realized that I would be leaving very soon. I graduate in May. And I’m not ready. I’ve grown to really love it here. I’ve grown to really connect with people here. My friend Dan Cegla and I were having a conversation about friendships. He is still really good friends with people he met in elementary school. The oldest friend I have is my twin. That’s it. I told him that after I leave Portland I’ll probably never see him again and he calls that stupid. I tell him point blank, “I’m just being realistic Dan, God is calling me to mission work overseas. I’ll probably see you once or twice.” He thought about it for a while and said that on some level he can see the benefit of being able to move quite easily. He said, “at least you’ll have lots of new friends all the time.” And I said, “Yea but I don’t have any real old friends.” It’s kind of a give and take. I think I’ve made some real friends here. Recently God took something from me. It was painful. It still is painful, but I’ve come to the realization that He did that to remind me that I’m leaving soon. Whether I end up in the UK or Taiwan I’ll be leaving. I can’t be growing attached here and making plans with people here. I got caught up in living for myself and I forgot. I forgot what it means to follow Christ. Laying down my life to live for God. I think for the first time I’m not looking forward to this. I know its coming, so its time to start preparing for this. All the joys and happiness is worth it. All the sadness and pain is worth it. His kingdom is worth it.
I’m with you, my daughter…don’t be discourage don’t lose heart. The battle is mine, I have come before you. Follow me.
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
