Jonas and I have been married for almost two months. Our two month anniversary is October 2nd. Perhaps it doesn't seem like a big deal but it is to us. We spent the greater part of our relationship apart. The longest we spent together in the same city was probably 6 months. But we didn't always see each other everyday and we both had very busy lives.
Now that we have moved to Oxford, we spend every minute of every hour of every day together. We don't argue as much as I thought we would but we do get a little annoyed by each other. For example Jonas bites his nails which drives me crazy. But I tend to clean and clean all the time. We have been in Oxford for exactly one week and I've swept the floor five days out of the seven. I've also picked things off the floor and wiped down all the counters after every single meal. I've vacuumed twice and organised the refrigerator twice. As you can see we both have our faults.
The thing we've come to realise is how different each of us communicates. It really is like we are speaking two completely different languages.
For example yesterday in London I was feeling a little bummed because we didn't get a chance to try out a food cart called "Roast to go" in London. They were open on Saturday but not on Sunday. Jonas and I had plans on Saturday and he really wanted to go to the British Library and Museum fearing that we wouldn't have enough time on Sunday since we were heading back on Sunday.
After moping around for a few hours after church on Sunday I shared with Jonas why I just wasn't in the best mood.
He felt badly about it and said I could find a restaurant now and we would go eat anything I wanted. It was a bit difficult because I didn't have access to internet but I tried my best to find a good place to eat. In the end we chose a Lebanese restaurant and Jonas commented on the high price of the restaurant. (I actually choose the one of the cheaper options in London) But once he said that I got really upset. He didn't understand. For Jonas he felt that we were getting the food I wanted and there was no reason for me to be upset.
I explained to him that I was already upset that I didn't get to go to the restaurant I wanted but now the place I chose was too expensive. We could have easily gone to the museum and library on Sunday and gone to the restaurant on Saturday but all he wanted to do was go to museum and library on Saturday even after I told him that the restaurant would only be open on Saturday.
He still didn't understand. He said I was being unreasonable and to him, food is food, he doesn't care if its good and as long as we got to eat now what difference did that make. We basically talked in circles because he couldn't understand where I was coming from and I felt like he wasn't even listening to me.
After our terrible lunch experience (the food was good, our conversation was not) we got on the bus back to Oxford and I was left wondering, "What a complete waste of conversation." Of course I wanted Jonas to see what the big deal was but what was there to complain about. We were in London and having a great time. There are many people suffering without food and all I wanted was to have my pick of the best food. To Jonas he wanted the best books and a tour of the best museum in the world and there are people in the world who would give anything to read a book or be given an opportunity to learn how to read.
I can't help but be reminded of what Jesus talks about when he shares about the least of these. https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+25:31-46 Matthes 25:31-46.
I want to remember how Christ has called us to live. This scripture is not simply about treating the least of these well but also putting our desires down to remember the least of these. It is a two way street. Self forgetfulness and inviting those who have less into our lives to act as a reminder to be thankful for all we have.
It was a great trip. Here is a video if you wish to take a glimpse into our weekend.
https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=10101409864187967&set=vb.30608405&type=2&theater
